Remember those questions back in elementary school?
“Who is your biggest role model?“
“What do you want to be when you grow up?”
Those questions would always foster answers like:
“Beyoncé because I want to be able to sing and dance as fierce as her,” or
“Jennifer Lopez because she’s beautiful and makes a lot of money!”
However, there were some that pierced your heart, like “my mom because she works two jobs but still finds time to help me with my homework.” Though these weren’t as common, they were very much unique responses that contradict what society has deemed extraordinary.
‘Ordinary’ women are usually overlooked and forgotten. Without the right title to their name, women can easily be disqualified as impactful. However, ordinary women can have just as much influence on someone’s life as a musician, movie star or public figure.
Those ordinary moments are worth it
I’ve always admired influential women like Emma Watson for empowering women and her support for feminism. Women like Angelina Jolie are not only heralded for their talents, but for having impactful platforms. However, mothers who work two jobs to make ends meet for their families should also be recognized. Young adults paying for college while working and studying are people to look up to as well.
Social media is a prevalent aspect in our everyday lives so it can become second nature to compare your lifestyle to someone else’s. Society has perfected the art of causing some to believe that their ‘ordinary’ lifestyle is nowhere near influential.
Let’s start here first
“You’re not too early, you’re not too late, you are right on time.”
As a woman, the pressure of having your life all together can be overwhelming. Some people expect you to be engaged in your early 20s. Around the age of 26, you’re supposed to be married. Then children should be in the mix by 28, followed by a thriving career at 30. Can I dare say this mindset is a prison that holds women from reaching their greatest potential? Society has painted this picture of the perfect life for women by having all of those milestones in that order. But luckily, different women have different paths. You are right where you need to be, despite which stage of life you have. Whatever that end goal is, you are right on time.
Remind yourself
Ladies, it’s time to remind yourselves that posted pictures on social media are not reality! Comparing your view of the limited version of yourself to the ‘best’ version of someone else is not worth comparison. “They seem to be raising their kids perfectly,” or “wow, another engagement post.” But remember, it took work to get there. That work-in-progress version of yourself deserves the appreciation that can only be taken away by comparison.
Stay focused
“Focus your eyes and mind on what lays ahead of you, not behind, not left or right; straight ahead of you.”
My mom would always encourage me with sayings like this, sayings that would refocus my mind. Ladies, you must focus on your grind! Those little baby steps that you’re making are victory steps, each one getting closer and closer to your goal and to your endgame. Don’t let the huge leaps that other women are accomplishing water down your small successes.
Your job is just as influential!
It’s easy to compare your job to others. Seeing other ladies consistently succeed can be discouraging if you feel as if you’re constantly on the sidelines. If we’re being totally honest, the pressure of having a huge job title as a young millennial woman can become overwhelming. However, those medical clerk jobs, those restaurant waitresses, those stay-at-home moms, etc. are just as influential as the next woman making her mark. Regardless of what job you have and what industry you’re in, someone is watching, observing and learning from you.
Surround yourself with role models!
“Behind every successful woman are her female friends saying, ‘you can do it babe’ when she felt like perhaps, she could not.”
Surrounding yourself with other role models that encourage and inspire you will only motivate you to become the best version of yourself. While you are working on advancing your hustle and focusing on your grind, there is someone else admiring you, viewing you as their role model.
Your ‘ordinary’ lifestyle is also ‘extraordinary’ despite how mundane your daily activities are. So ladies, remember how much progress you’ve made in life and how many struggles you’ve overcome. The best version of yourself is just as worthy as your work in progress version….both versions being extraordinary.
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Written by Kendra Anderson
Illustrated by Francesca Mariama
